This afternoon, Wendy and I delivered a short session entitled NLP in Love. We explored a few simple NLP techniques that can enhance the quality of relationships.
We found how “Perceptual Positions” help us understand things from the other person’s perspective – especially when we take the time to really step into their shoes and experience things from their model of the world. It’s a pretty easy process, at least once you learn it. We used the Dilts Meta Mirror exercise.
The subject of “presence” came up a few times, in particular how important it is to spend time totally focused on the other person… in this age of short attention spans, having the undivided attention of another person is perhaps even more precious and valued than ever before.
If you really care about someone, it’s pretty smart to let them know! Not just to feel that way, but to let them know that you feel that way, and to communicate it in a way that they’ll understand. So we explored love strategies, the specific experiences that can help us feel loved. For one person, it involved receiving money (really!!!); for another, it just took a certain look or a touch on the shoulder. We’re each unique, but understanding ourselves can help us better communicate our needs and to better understand those we care about.
More generally, use what works for you…
It’s been more than a dozen years since I discovered NLP and I’m still enjoying learning more…
Of course if you’re interested in learning more about Wendy’s studies into intimate relationships, see Dao of Love